It's been a week of pure bliss, no sleep, lots of dirty diapers, lots of tears from both mamma and baby as we get used to each other, and endless snuggles that make my heart melt every single time. Keegan is truly the biggest blessing to Luke & I, and I finally feel like my true purpose in life is found. In honor of our baby boy being here with us for a week already (WHAT?), I thought I would share my birth story with you all and the adventures we've had already. Because my life has changed so dramatically since last Sunday; in the best way I'd ever hope for. (If you don't love the details or care to read, I am at least making this entry as record keeping of this amazing and crazy adventure.)
Last weekend on Friday and Saturday, Luke and I were trying everything in the book to get our baby here. We were both tuckered out from real life (LOL, little did we know how tiring this new life would be), and I didn't want to wait til my due date anymore on the following Tuesday. I was very pregnant, swollen, and way too eager to meet the little babe who was constantly kicking my ribs and pushing his head down. (Now thats a discomfort I don't miss). Looking back I had had some contractions both Friday morning and Saturday night, so it only makes sense I went into labor early Sunday morning. After chomping on pineapple (softens your cervix), taking endless walks around the neighborhood (I mostly just waddled...), napping like crazy and getting amazing sleep the night before (old wives tale that if you sleep really well one night-you're likely to go into labor the next), and then of course ending the pregnancy the way it started LOL. (I'll keep that super PG and let you put the pieces together...). (I feel like I shouldn't have shared that.... hahah.)
I had this feeling all weekend that that was it, the last weekend as Luke and Kali and I. We lazed around all day and I had this unshakable feeling that we were in our last hours before our baby joined us. And I was most definitely right! Good thing my hospital bag was packed and ready to go! Sunday morning I woke up at 4am with what felt like really bad menstrual cramps, like theeee worst. I didn't think they were contractions because they had zero real pattern and were so random. Painful, but random. I tried to sleep some more, but by 7am I was up out of bed and taking a shower and eating breakfast because of the pain and nausea. I sat on the recliner afterwards and Kali jumped up on my lap and rested her head on my stomach and kept looking at me like she knew something I didn't. I texted my doctor and we agreed that I was contracting every two minutes on average and that I should go to the hospital to have my cervix checked, because by this time it was 9am and my body had been doing this for 5 hours.
The previous Thursday at my doctor appt I was dilated to a 3 and my cervix was 60% effaced. When we got to the hospital I was a 4 1/2 almost a 5 and 75% effaced. They decided to admit me and I knew then baby would most likely be joining us that day. They gave me some pain meds for the contractions.. I don't even remember what it was called but MAN WAS IT AWESOME. Luke tells me that I got a little loopy and a little funny, all I remember was feeling goooooood. Haha! Around 11 or 12 I was taken to a delivery room where we'd spend the next 10-11 hours. They had me take many walks and I even got to a point where they had me shower to help relax and stop fighting contractions, cause every time I tensed up instead of breathing through them my body stopped doing what it was supposed to. Luke was AWESOME and dressed down to scrubs to help me shower and just be there for me. And he walked those halls endlessly with me and was so supportive.
Finally around 4 or so, my amazing doctor Nicole Anderson gave me some choices since labor stopped progressing quickly and was almost at a stand-still. It was either another shower to relax more, pitocin, or epidural. I decided for the epidural, and while we waited for the anesthesiologist, they had me sit on a exercise ball and roll my lower body into figure 8's, and bending down during contractions to push baby's head down. I was getting some good contractions, and so I started to look forward to the epidural... but I was still TERRIFIED. Needles and me don't go together... especially the huge ones that go in your back!
Around 5:30, the anesthesiologist (who was super awesome...I forget his name because secretly I didn't want to see him walk through the door LOL; I'm such a wimp) came in and we signed consent forms and got ready. Luke sat in front of me while I hid my head in a pillow and tried my best to get through it. I was a little bit of a squirmer... it kind of hurt a lot... but it was done soon and I felt my bum and legs go tingly. They laid me back and told me to try and nap with a peanut ball between ,my legs (goes between your legs and helps your cervix open naturally), so I think up until the 7:30 hour I was trying to nap.... butttttt guess what? My ever famous heartburn that I endured all pregnancy came in big time and by the time medicine came, I was about to throw up. And that I did. And it was miserable. But on the bright side, they have really cool throw up bags..... haha.
Apparently this was the transitioning point and my body went into full gear. Because of the contractions, I couldn't feel pain but I could feel pressure. So I felt all of my contractions, could wiggle my toes and move my legs. We were going to wait a little longer to call my doctor, but on certain contractions I felt so much pressure that when they checked, helloooo baby's head! I was completely dilated to a 10 and I was fully effaced. We called my doctor down and then by 9:50 we were ready to push.
Pushing a baby out of your hoo-hah... let me tell you... is no easy task. But I shouldn't complain because I had it pretty easy, some women have it really hard. After getting my breathing down and learning how to push through contractions, and by help of a mirror (sounds weird but it was so helpful!), and my mom and Luke holding my legs, we pushed for 10-15 minutes and by 10:03 Keegan was born. The mirror was amazing, because not only did it help me channel my pushes, I got to watch my son being born. And it was the most beautiful (and scary haha) thing I've ever seen. As soon as they placed him on my chest I was so overwhelmed with relief and gratitude and unbelievable love for my sweet baby. The first thing I cried was "my baby!" and "you're so perfect!!" and kept crying over how beautiful he was and kept saying "oh my gosh" over and over again. Luke was bawling with happiness and instantly we both felt so much love and pride over what we brought into the world. Childbirth is an amazing experience. So hard... but nothing like it, ever. I could have not done it without my husband, my mother, my amazing nurses and doctor, and all the supportive family that waited in the waiting room ALL DAY. Such troopers. It was an all day endeavor, but it was so worth it and the reward in the end would make me do it as many times as I had to just to get him here.
His cry was the most beautiful thing I've ever heard, and here, as I sit awake at 4:30 am and just got through a night shift of poopy diapers, fussy baby and lots of feedings... it's still beautiful even if it is causing me sleep deprivation. Becoming a mother is the most beautiful transition I've ever known and I feel so proud of myself- cause that was no walk in the park. But I would walk that park all over again.
We had our families sneak in after I fed Keegs (which, he then passed his first stool on my chest LOL), for the first time and they all gathered around him as the nurses took his measurements. I sat in my hospital bed with these amazing heated blankets on my body and I admired him with the rest of the family. I think everyone was instantly in love too :)
Sweet baby weighed 7 pounds, 13 oz- which SHOUT OUT to my dad for nailing that one on the head! And he was 20 inches. They took his sweet footprints and gave him his first bath. It was about midnight at this point and everyone was tired. I was so tired but running on so much adrenaline and outpouring love that I didn't even care. I was finally able to get up and roll my baby in his bassinet/cart to our postpartum room with Luke, and like I said, we were tired, but beaming.
Recovery is no joke. So much blood (did you want to know that?), and so much soreness. But I had amazing nurses and an amazing husband who took great care of me the entire 24 hours we were there after delivery. I also wanted to take this time to thank all of our visitors, for all the beautiful flowers and all the fun gifts. Luke and I appreciate all the love and support so much. Keegan doesn't even know yet how stinkin' loved he is (and spoiled), but I'm sure he can feel it.
We came home on Tuesday, which is good because I was starting to have mini panic attacks because I wanted to get out so bad and waiting to be discharged was hard to get through. I was ready to get home to my Kali (who missed me just as much as I missed her, thats for sure...), and start our new life all together as a little family. Keegan did great in his carseat and Kali did great meeting him for the first time. She LOVES HIM. She is already so protective and anytime he cries, she is so attentive and then whimpers until I take care of his needs. It's quite amazing seeing her love for him; even though sometimes she doesn't understand her strength and Keegs gets pretty powerful kisses from her, haha.
Our first night... LOL. Let's just say we had to call in reinforcements for the rest of the week from the grammy's. But we're getting used to each other now and getting the hang of it. now that my body is used to the little amount of sleep I get. (From the morning I went into labor to the end of our first night, I had honestly maybe 3 hours of sleep. Anyone who knows me, knows that that is seriously impressive. I love my sleep. But I now love my baby more). But its still amazing going through all of this. I love him more everyday and never could imagine how much I would love Luke even more, too. He's been absolutely amazing, attentive, supportive, and kind to me as my body has been recovering and changing. He loves his son just as much as I do and it's totally sweet to see.
We're doing good. We are. We are so happy and so in love and can't imagine our lives without him now. If you're still reading this, I applaud you. Thank you for reading about the most amazing experience that I hold so near and dear to my heart. I have so much gratitude for my Heavenly Father. I can't believe he blessed Luke and I with the most perfect child I never knew I deserved. My whole life has changed, but I couldn't be more grateful than I am today. How people don't believe in a God is beyond me... because when I look at my miraculous and angelic baby, I know more now in my heart than ever... God is so, so real and so, so good. I don't know what Luke and I did right to deserve Keegan.... but I'm not going to question it. God hears our prayers and wants to give us the ultimate blessings, we just have to have faith and trust in Him and do our part.
I hope to raise Keegan with Luke the best way we know how and hope that he'll forgive us someday for the mistakes we inevitably make along the way. It's a good thing love outweighs the messups. Cause there's a lot of love goin' on in our home now, and my heart is so full.
Keegan Brooks Valdez, how we love you; welcome to the world sweet baby.
