Bad Dreams; New Wings

Have you ever had dreams where they feel so real, you wake up with your heart pounding and tears just streaming down your cheeks? Where you literally can feel everything that happens in your dream? This morning was one of those moments. Instead of posting on Facebook and saying that really annoying line "The moment where..." because literally those status's are bugging me, I wanted to just blog, because it's what I seem to do these days. And probably because Facebook is starting to bug me.
          So, just a wild guess, but what was my dream about? You got it, college! And usually I run to Maren or Liza, and talk about how I "don't want to go to college anymore!". Because of course I do, but you have to admit because it's the only thing constantly on my mind- all I am left to think about is the part of actually leaving. The dream consisted of the goodbies and the part of traveling to where I'll live for the new part of my life. In my dream, my parent's sent me off on my own, in my car. My directions were on a paper from google. My mom handed me all my childhood CD's and told me to turn up the music to keep me awake. I said goodbye to family, friends, my horse, and my childhood room. It was just a dream- but man, was that hard! As I drove off, everything was left in my rearview mirror. With that, I woke up.
          Even if it was a just a silly little bad dream, it got to me. I had Kyle come lay down with me and being the sweet little boy he is, he told me everything will be okay. Once you get past the little annoying parts, he is the greatest little boy I will ever know. I think he might be a very hard part to leave. We went and visited our Mimi, and of course, being the wise lady she is- we talked about my future. One thing she said stuck out to me. "Even though this door is closing, and another one is opening- you must remember, that door that is "closing" will never really close. It's just a door stop- you will ALWAYS be able to come back home, Makenna." That will always be a comfort- HOME. As we were leaving, she told me that home will always be my nest, and it will always be warm- it is our comfort zone. But guess what? Everything I've ever known, has led me to the point where I have to let go, where I have to how she said, "Open those little wings, flap them as hard as you can, and fly." Those words will stay with me, even through the bad dreams. I guess, you could call them my new wings, specifically designed for what's ahead. So what am I going to do? Open my little wings, flap them as hard as I can, and fly. When the times comes, that is.

One Step Closer

This week has been pretty darn cool. Thursday was probably the best day, for sure. I didn't have practice that night, so I took advantage of relaxing after Landon's first basketball game. I was checking my emails and was notified that a decision had been made in my application for BYU-Idaho. I quickly then went to the website and sure enough... my heart was literally about to stop. So nervous. And I opened my eyes between my fingers covering my face and saw "Congratulations!" and that's all I needed to see. I grabbed my phone and sent out texts to my parents, friends, and family. Even posted it on Facebook. I'm excited, can't you tell? Guess how many likes I got on it so far? 104 so far ;)
              My Grandma bawled, my mom jumped up and down, and my dad said "Cool! Good Job!". Haha, typical Dad. I mean, of course he was excited for me, but women tend to show more emotion, correct? Well, as for me, my heart was happy happy. Now, I just have to wait for my track. I'M ONE STEP CLOSER!
              Friday was awesome. BREAKING DAWN WAS SO GREAT. My friends hated it, but I thought it was absolutely wonderful. Probably I'm a sucker for romance, and I love Robert Pattison and Taylor Lautner. Drill Team got our own showing, and then went to Incas. YUM. I then, AGAIN sang the National Anthem at a play off game at Lions. It was so cold, but I got to sing up in the booth! Then my good friend Heidi P and I got to play nintendo and drink hot chocolate at my house. We crashed early. Forget about the late nights anymore- by Tuesday your exhausted. Literally.
               Saturday was also great. My body doesn't let me sleep in anymore, so ten was the latest I slept. Baha, even that is pretty late, but not as late as what I used to. I went to Kyle's basketball game, what a baller. My Dad put my snow tires on and I cleaned out my car completely once I got home. Every compartment, under every seat, and nook and cranny. It felt very clean. My chore for the day was to clean the bathroom. OH YUCK. When you share a bathroom with 3 other boys... it literally becomes a TASK and it's just gross. The toothpaste bottle is messy and exploding, and dirty clothes and water are just everywhere. I'm pretty sure I know the culprit of water everywhere. Josh obviously likes to come out of the shower dripping and not wipe up all the water. SO ANNOYING. The bathroom is a flood after him. SO, that was quite fun. I then got ready for my last Sadies dance ever! It was absolutely great. I took Josh Black, one of my good friends. Our group made homemade pizzas at the Bergeson's, and we had a chocolate fondue fountatin. It was a complete mess; flour and chocolate everywhere. But we had so much fun. Before we went to the dance, we played a card game and IT WAS SO STUPID. Pounce is the name. Josh and I suck at that game.
            At the dance, we had a blast. The decorations were awesome, the music wasn't all that bad, and it was in the gym, so there was more room. Yeah, there was the typical dirty dancing everywhere- but you could pick out the Mormons. We danced at the front of the gym, and we had so much fun, dancing the right way and the clean BUT fun way. It was awesome. We actually stayed for a good hour and a half- better than Homecoming. As we walked out, we were happy because we left that dance knowing we chose the right. The right language, the right dancing, and the right people. We even started singing our EFY Theme Song. "We believe all things, and the hope He brings. It's a light into the darkness, there's a fire in our hearts. And we believe He knows, every one of us will grow. Planted like a seed of faith- WE BELIEVE!".
            We were just being silly, but it still spiritual for me because it was true. We are an example of the believers. We are happy! So, we went to the Earl's house and played telephone charades, then spoons, and had donuts and ice cream cake, and then we all went on our merry ways. Josh and I had a good talk on the way home about missions, and our non member friends. We just have to keep doing the right thing. I had a great night.

Today is Sunday and I am freezing in this house. But, I love these days because I am in sweats and a sweatshirt and fuzzy socks with my hair up in a ponytail. There's good food everywhere, and the candles are lit. The whole Hirz family will be getting together tonight to celebrate my cousin's Sweet 16. I remember that day ;) It's days like these that I will most definitely miss at College. But I am so looking forward to what's coming up. Everyday is one step closer. 

                                                        I am really getting excited.

Miss Makenna.

Today at the elementary school, the kids in the reading group that I work with were working on a dinosaur project, where they have to do a fake news piece on dinosaurs, volcanoes, etc. One of my third graders named Kawehi (Kah-vay-hee) came up to me and said "Miss Makenna, how do you spell attacked?". I helped him spell it out, and as he walked away, I thought about what he said. MISS MAKENNA. It's got a cute little ring to it. My kids always call me Makenna, and only a few say Miss Makenna if they don't know really what to call me. And when I hear it, it makes me smile and think about how cute it is. But, the way Kawehi said it... he said it so seriously, so professional. I like the fact that my teacher name is Miss Makenna. Just say it a couple times in your head, and it might just start to sound cool. Someday, I want to have my own dreams to start coming true, and actually have a teacher name. Ms. Hirz, or... well, someday it'll be different. :)
           For the past 2 weeks I've been working on my college application to BYU-Idaho. And man, has it been scary. BUT SO EXCITING. I've had a total of 3 meltdowns. That's a good for me. My ACT testing and score didn't go the way I would have liked, but it's okay. It can't be that hard to get into college, right? I have so much more to offer than just silly little scores. So, I have all my parts done, just waiting on my transcripts to be sent down there. Everyday, in the back of my mind, I keep having a prayer in my heart and positive thoughts. I so badly want to leave this next fall, be down there and really start my life.
            I have this little dream of being an elementary teacher, having my own classroom, my own kids to teach... once I complete the four years down at BYU. It sounds so good in my head. When people always asked me what I wanted to do when I "grew up", I never knew what to tell them. I think I got it now. I want to give back, to be the teacher I always needed growing up, and to teach kids things that will help build them. Being at the grade school everyday at the end of the day usually sets the tone for the rest of the evening. The kids may be crazy, after all... kids WILL be kids... but I love them- they are so happy and life for them is coloring crayons, p.b&j sandwiches, and recess. Oh, to be that little again. Each day when I get there, they are so happy to see me, so eager to learn the sign language I teach them, and always hug me before they leave and say "Thank you for the wonderful day.". No really, thank you. These little kids have so much desire and they WANT to impress you, and boy... are they funny.
          Someday, it'll all work out. My plan may not be the same as Heavenly Father's plan for me, but I am willing to accept whatever will happen, and has to happen, in order for my dreams to start being real. For the first time ever, I'm starting to feel a little bit well... grown up. I probably say that a thousand times, but there's no feeling compared to realizing this... Life is about to begin! So, got to keep smiling, doing all I can, and ENJOY my moments left. Here's a few Senior Photos :) All the credit to Chelsi Chamberlain for taking them! Excellent work!